"Helloooo Computer!"
When I was a young nerd, I long promised myself that there were certain things I would have some day. Some day, I thought, some day I’ll have… that. Or that. Or that. Let’s face it, there were a lot of things I lusted after, reading magazines, watching movies, playing video games. Many of them were far out of reach. I still do not own a Porsche, or one of the models in the Victoria’s Secret catalogue. And yet somehow I’m not as enthusiastic about having either in my life as I once was, either. Some others, of course, have long since come true, and did in fact prove to be quite a let-down.
One that sticks out in my mind is having a computer that I could talk to and issue voice commands. When I first discovered Star Trek, we had just moved to a new town, and I didn’t know many of the other kids. I was shy, and it was a small, very tight-knit community; the escape of a world of make-believe, set in the future, had a certain magical allure to it. On top of that, Star Trek was fantastically popular at the time, and I quickly discovered that it was an easy talking point for just about everyone in the class. Nerd or not, virtually everyone watched it, and it was an easy way to join in on conversations with kids I didn’t yet know. So even without being that enthusiastic about it, I made sure to watch every new episode when it aired, and gradually the world drew me in. One particular aspect was this near-magical computer that had almost limitless amounts of knowledge on board. Every tidbit of wisdom from the entire history of mankind was at their fingertips, and all they had to do was ask for it, by prefacing any query with, “Computer…?”
I thought this idea was brilliant, and I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how one might go about making that work. A centralized computer core, with a microphone in each room, that could noise-cancel ambient sounds, and a speaker network throughout to announce responses, all that seemed simple enough. But to have enough knowledge that it could actually know the answers? And understand the query? That seemed unattainable.
And then, years later, in my dorm room at university, I discovered that I actually had a computer that could do much of this. With some simple scripts, I could even teach it to do web searches and read out responses, even if they were all largely useless. Still, the idea of being able to speak commands was pretty awesome. I set up a microphone, hidden in the living room, and when I used my computer to play music as a juke-box when we’d have guests over for drinks, it was a neat party trick to be able to say, “Oh, I don’t like this song. Computer, next song!”, and have the computer skip to the next track. But that was really all it was. A party trick.
Now, of course, I have extensive voice-command abilities in my car. It can navigate, find radio stations, pick songs, and do a whole lot of things for me, with a simple voice command. And I never use it, because the buttons are more convenient. Similarly, Siri is on the iPhone, and similar apps are on Android phones, and I never bother with them either. As it turns out, barking commands at an inanimate object is just as strange and awkward as it seems to be on Star Trek.
What gadget or piece of technology did you, as a child, always promise yourself that you would someday have?
I find barking commands at my Android phone quite useful while driving. NAVIGATE TO <destination desired> or TEXT <friend>. It's also a
convenientinaccurate way to respond to texts.One friend and I have actually made a game of it. He'll send me texts by voice command, and whatever it gets, whatever it interprets, he just hits send, and it's my job to try and figure out what the hell he was trying to say.
My favourite was a text that read, "Lackey barstool are you were still here Margaret up there in."
Neither of us has the slightest clue what that text was supposed to say.
The Mrs. can usually guestimate what the text is trying to convey, but yes it is a fun game. My most recent:
"At least you get lunch. Today I am hauling ass back to Lawrenceburg for a bid due at 200 after leaving the church at 1230" = At least you get lunch today I'm hauling ass back to lawrence for drive if I didn't like you look like after leaving the church at 1230
Well, I can't honestly say I've ever promised myself that I would have X thing in the future, well not as a child child. I'm anxiously awaiting 2014 because there is one car that I want more than any other in the world. I already own two sports cars but something in me will not let go of the desire to own a Silvia S15.
A car with a digital dash. Particularly a Corvette with a digital dash. I did get a 1994 Corvette in 1998. The dash was the worst part of the car. by that point they mixed digital and analog gauges. The analog gauges were non-linear and the digital ones weren't that precise.
Now I would stay away from a digital dash.
I wanted a jetpack, I expected the SDF-1 to come through the atmosphere in 1999 and give us the technology to venture to the stars; I dreamed of living on a space station – the books I read as a kid in the 80's promised things like space station hotels and yet here we are stagnant on earth.
I would argue in the case of Tom-Tom and Siri it was the computers who had voice control over us.
I kinda always wanted a desktop computer. My mom and dad wouldn't buy me a C-64 or whatever was out there in 1980. I finally did buy my very own built to order PC, in 2001 or so, well after my dad had owned one for years. A cell phone inevitably followed, maybe around 2003.
I still want a trans-mat beam, and a Tardis. I don't care if it time travels, as long as it's bigger on the inside.
Oh my, a dream that I've had since I was a child was to possess a fearsome doomsday device and hold the fate of the world in my hands, and I have achieved my dream. In spades. So well, in fact, that I need to get rid of some of them to make room for some new ideas.
I'll take the spheroboom.
http://gijoe.wikia.com/wiki/Weather_Dominator
Anything Cobra made in the GI Joe cartoons. Weather Dominator, Mass Device, anything Destro could come up with for them.
Seriously, with this summer we are having. I could rule the world. You want rain? That'll be XXX amount of dollars, please.
You could build a weather control device but rather then place it on land or in the atmosphere you would want to place it in the water and use it to control ocean temperature, there by controlling storm patterns and in effect ocean currents.
I always wanted a holodeck. And a replicator. And from non-Star Trek scifi, a flying car. With or without time traveling abilities, I don't discriminate.
I also always envisioned that the future would bring with it the ability to look at something and capture an image of that, saved like a file and stored in the brain for future retrival. Spelling test? Call up the list image. See an awesome car for a fleeting moment in traffic? Take an instantaneous snap-shot to download later. Cell phones with cameras and internet have certainly gotten us closer, but it's not the same.
I still think about this when I see a perfectly framed photo that quickly disappears, but the framed image is still in my mind. Or when I want to remember something that I can remember seeing, but I can't make my brain call up the requisite information.
Sure, this brings up all those religious/metaphysical questions of man versus machines, and maybe even the specter of a cyborg take-over; but I still sometimes wish I could do it, and have wanted to since I was a kid.
I hate voice controll. Am I the only one? I find it harder to think of what to say coherently than just doing it.
I fear being forced to use voice control just because everyone else thinks it's "omg awsum!"
Computer… uhm… make the blue thing … uh, no. Take the, 1, 2, 3, the 3rd column and transpose it with the, uh, 7th column? Yeah, the 7th column. NO! Not that, I meant the 8th column. Argh!!! No, not “arc.” I said “argh.” It doesn't mean anything. Just stop. Just stop. I'll do it myself.
I still want my flying car, dammit!
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